The Most Beautiful & Transformative Writing Challenge of My Life
Phenomenal Substack writers, creators and friends helped liberate me from PTSD and heal my wounds - leading to the most amazing writing challenge of my life.
A lot of Substack writers discuss the importance of writing with purpose or intent.
But what happens once you fulfill that purpose or goal sooner than expected?
Personally, my purpose when launching on Substack was to illustrate the realities of surviving an American mass shooting and other modern American traumas (sexual assault), advocate resource development for fellow survivors and prove there is beauty to life post-trauma.
I didn’t expect the beautifully deep connections I’d build.
I vastly overestimated the potential for financial success.
And underestimated the potential healing.
But the benefits have brought me to a precipice off of which I’m leaping.
Let’s rewind.
Publishing Surviving an American Mass Shooting alleviated a burden from my soul.
When Halloween rolled around, many of you empowered me to ask for Substack’s help to deal with PTSD by sending me your celebrations.
Many wonderful writers, creators and friends shared stories of Halloweens past, wonderful images, like this gem accompanied by a vulnerable and brave story from
:
Or
who wrote a fascinating piece she shared:
Wonderful people, far and wide, made this the best Halloween in 20 years.
Even
, an old friend from our shared hometown with whom I’ve reconnected here, knowing my love of street murals and the culture, sent this from her new home in Mexico:
And, of course, a special surprise edition and beautiful poetry from my collaborator,
- so special it’s worthy of its own post.I’ll admit, I’m surprised at how much it helped. But it did.
Sharing the truth with each of you, and your generous responses, liberated me from chains I hadn’t quite shaken.
Of course, life goes on and promptly beat the crap out of me a little. Fortunately, I can take a hit.
But once I found stillness?
Oh fuck.
It worked.
The freedom. The beautiful possibilities. Achievable options.
But…
what the fuck am I going to write?
I still have my content calendar. I have content ready to go.
But… I’ve written some new pieces that deviate from that plan (God laughs, I know).
Not on trauma. Not on pain. Or PTSD.
But the beauty of life. And that means my version of beauty. Messy, delicious, simple, nuanced beauty.
Because that’s it, right? Even when we are beaten down and need a friend to drag us to our feet, life is beautiful.
Yes, I’ll continue sharing my story, coping mechanisms, advocate for mental health resources for mass shooting survivors - all the stuff, perhaps in different ways.
But maybe not right now - unless it will help others I love.
I need to pivot and savor it all.
My writing challenge is an exploration of the discoveries that come with my new freedom. Celebrating some beauty, highlighting some wonder while still sharing my secrets and being a bad bitch when necessary (or deserved… IFYKYK).
The truth is, I need to let my spirit soar free and discover new, great heights.
I finally have options. It’s stunningly overwhelming to be free.
For the first time in decades, I feel the greatness in me.
The Universe is unfurling an entirely new path, scroll to be written, full of potential, possibilities and wonder.
My intent is to embrace it - no matter the fear.
And it’s terrifying in the best possible - and beautiful - way.
Thank you, to the wonderful people who have been by my side - especially those from across the world.
I can’t wait to share what’s next.
But more importantly, so many hugs, love and appreciation each of the wonderful people who helped me heal. Each of you cheered me on, restacked, sent kind comments, created content and uplifted me. I’m so humbled.
(I must also thank my wonderful parents, family, friends, etc.)
I’m not done thanking you yet:
(and as Substack loads all of the other names, I will continue to add).
Your story is incredible, and you are an amazing, beautiful human! I’m humbled that you shared your story and let us be a tiny part of it. Keep on being you, healing bravely, and living your story unapologetically!! 🖤💖❤️🩹
I'm very glad you are becoming what you intend to be! Sending you more love n light plus tons of hugs! 💕✨️🤗🌻