Resiliency Training 101 | 15 Basic but Hard-Learned Truths

15 things I’ve learned about resilience - not from a textbook, but from lived experience, years of reflection and helping others survive the unthinkable.

Today’s world often confuses resilience with perfection.

Or with never crying, never faltering, never breaking stride - but resilience isn’t always stoic. Or robotic.

It’s survival with your soul in tact.

It’s crying but marching on anyway.

It’s choosing to live through everything, not in spite of it.

As someone who has lived through trauma, mass violence, betrayal, grief, and rebirth, I don’t just write about resilience - I embody it.

In hospitals, after political violence, assaults, moments of utter despair - I didn’t just bounce back. I rebuilt. I rewired.

And I want to help others do the same.

So here’s what I know to be true about resilience - not from theory or textbooks but from bone-deep experience:

What I Know About Resilience

1 | Resilience isn’t resistance - it’s recovery.

Being strong doesn’t mean refusing to bend. It means knowing how to heal when you break. It means developing flexibility.

Resistance tightens; resilience releases.

One may leave you brittle and easy to break…